Monday, December 15, 2014

Christmas Songs That Are Just The Worst


I love Christmas time. The lights, the decorations, all the happy small faces as they open presents, the gatherings and parties. It is one of my favorite times of year.

However there are things about this, one of my favorite times of year, that I do not like (other than fruitcake. We need to let that tradition die, guys). 

The one I want to talk about is ridiculous music that is being played thoughout shops and stores. There are so many fun, festive, and faithful Christmas songs. Some are spiritual, some are sacred, some are silly, but there are so many that are simply lovely. 

Then there's the ones on this list...the terrible, the awful, the ones that by there being played are secretly asking "Why do you guys still play me?"

"Happy Holidays"-
I guess this was the jazzy version of a Christmas song. Whatever "dickery-dock" means, I hope it translates to a retirement for this song. 

"Let It Snow"-
ESomebody sung this one to the max last year when we were all burdened by the Polar Vortex. Since last year, the very whisper of snow sends an evil icy chill up my spine. After living through that monster weather, I would rather just have only a bit of snow, a light dusting, only for Christmas, if you please.

"I'll Be Home for Christmas"-
This song just confuses me so bad. The lyrics say that you'll be home for Christmas, you make all these demands for snow and what not, then you say you'll be home by New Years Eve, then the song ends with you being home for Christmas in your mind. Umm, so either your a delusional crazy or your a flakey bossy person. Either way, let's never sing this one again. 

"Feliz Navidad"-
Now I'm all about cultural sharing, especially during the holidays, but seriously, this song gives me aserious case of the humbugs. Talk. About. Repetitive! Sheesh. I think there's a grand total of 20 words in the song total. 

"Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer"- 
But why? Who was supposed to be with Grandma? Why was she out so late? And why do so many people like this crazy song?

"Last Christmas"-
Aaaagh! This one is just the worst. I don't care who sings it, I simply loathe this song. It's repetitive lyrics, it's depressing subject matter, the fact that it's been remade every 5 years since it was first sung so sadly over the radio. 

Any Christmas Song by Mariah Carey- 
Now before you stone me, I know that a lot of people will disagree with this choice as number one, but personally I simply feel that she butchers them with her super sonic sounding voice. It's like there is too much voice verses the song matter. It overwhelms me...and bums me out.

What are the holiday songs you think should just go away?