Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Tuesday Shoesday: But Why? Boots that simply don't make sense

It's cold out there guys. 

There has already been some pretty major snowstorms and it isn't even been declared officially winter yet. With that being said, for those whom it applies, its time to pull out the serious footwear. 

A few weeks ago I came to the defense of my beloved Uggs. I mean, say what you want, those bad boys have gotten me through plenty a winter in super comfy, cozy and dry style. And while you may not like Uggs, if you live anywhere where boots are a necessity, you probably opt for a different pair of cozy footwear. 

As long as they keep your feet (and in some cases, legs) warm and dry, right? Think about what we basically require of our boots: keeps cold, wet, and slushy out, keeps heat in, comfortable to wear, and look good. 

But what about those boots that don't fulfill those requirements? They make it to this list:

1: The "Cute" version of the workboot:
I get it, this is supposed to be sexy, stylish and trendy. You wear these to match your boyfriend in his Timberlands, you think it's cute. But these aren't not very practical for real winter weather. I mean on, platform suede boots with a 6 inch heel and virtually no tread at all? Are these even warm? In a snowstorm, would your feet stay dry?

I saw a young woman today struggling through the sudden hailstorm that hit Philly, others with more efficient winter footwear ran around her to safety. I wondered what was going through her mind as she was pelted by ice? I imagined it could have been "Well, at least I look good. I ask, is the appearance of being cute ever worth the ease that comes with practicality? Certainly in that situation, no.

2: Chewbacka Feet
Seriously? Like, why? These look like they were pilfered from the showroom of a local taxidermist Buy a desperate and slightly psychotic fashionista. 

They may be warm, they may be cozy, but they are not cute to look at. And they don't look like they would even be easy to keep clean. Snow is only white for a certain period of time. Then it becomes super soupy slushy muddy grossness that stains wrecks and reeks havoc on any unprepared and unsuspecting form of footwear. I say abandon the Ewok feet and pick something little more winter ready.

3: Childish Boots
Now we all have an inner child that should be reached and nurtured at certain times, but I'm not sure if winter footwear is that time. Pom-poms? These look like they belong to my six-year-old niece, not a fellow semi functioning adult. And yes while they may be warm and cozy and keep your feet dry, is it really worth wearing a kids shoe as you strut off of the train to work?

4: Transparent Boots
Yikes, where to begin? Is it the stacked heel? The lack of any tread? The transparency? I don't believe those could possibly be cozy, although I imagine in warmer situations, these could make your feet pretty sweaty. Eww...

And they barely look comfortable, less functionable in real winter. In other words, these all around fail still practical winter boot test.

5: Ugg Look Alikes

This is going to make a few people mad, but just because it looks like something doesn't mean they come in the same quality. Ladies you've heard the adage that says you get what you pay for. In this case it is most certainly true. 

Sure they look similar to Ugg boots. But let a good snows come through. Let a sudden slush dropping nightmare fall while you're at work. Then take those puppies that you got at Payless for spin and see how they fare. Or you can buy a pair of UGG boots to wear in such situations that are definitely guaranteed to keep your feet in tiptop winter condition for years to come. The choice is yours.

I think I've been a little generous as there are other boots that I particularly don't care for. However, I chalk it up to my own personal fashion sense and own personal form of style, that if the four elements mentioned above are met then the boots I'll let them slide. 

Which boots make your "Why" list?