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Maya Angelou proves that too many of us have no home training...

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I was raised to call anyone older than me Mister, Miss, or Misses (our uncle or auntie for those who were like family even though, more often than not, they weren't related by blood at all). It's a sign of deference, respect, and honor to the person I was speaking to or about.

Some people call it "putting a handle on it", others will interrupt you mid-sentence following addressing them to correct you with their prefix. But whatever the case, it was a massive NO-NO to call an adult anything without a prefix attached unless given permission by that adult. Period.

Apparently, this "formality" isn't so popular.

Recently, an older video of a question and answer segment with Maya Angelou, perpetual woman crush of this here blog, surfaced that is causing quite a debate.

In the following video, most recently dredged up by Twitter user PrinceCharmingP, a teen named Kim is quickly, and oh so eloquently gathered by Ms. Angelou that she should refer to her as such.

As she explains "I have lived so long and tried so hard that a young woman like you, or any other has no, you have no license to come up to me and call me by my first name. That’s first. Also, because at the same time I am your mother, I am your auntie, I’m your teacher, I’m your professor, you see?"

Interestingly enough, a poll on Oprah Magazine shows that a whopping 34% of people don't see the point in addressing elders or people with authority by "putting a handle on it."

Indeed, many people on Twitter had things to say about Maya's response:



(I'm going to stop right there because the majority of the reactions prove that a lot of these users weren't raised, they were just had...)

However, there were even more who voiced a different opinion:


As pointed out by Twitter user SportyIDK, Ms. Angelou does, in fact, apologize to the young lady.

But not for the correction. Let it be noted that Maya Angelou does not apologize to Kim for correcting her poor choice of not initiating the conversation with a Ms., but rather the tone by which she spoke to Kim. Maya notes that it took her off guard that a 14-year-old would address her by her first name.

What bothers me most about this conversation is that it is even a conversation at all. A person who is older or more senior than you deserves to be called Miss or Mister. They earned that respect simply by their seniority, their age, and their wisdom that you, at this moment, do not yet possess. They are where you hope your life gets to one day. Therefore, a Mister or a Miss is rightful. That is the end of the discussion.

What's worse is that so many people took offense rather than the lesson of what Ms. Angelou was trying to teach at that moment. At that moment, forever captured and now reignited, Maya, the perpetual teacher, was teaching us all the principle of respect for our elders, something American Society often fails to do. Rather than taking the lesson, so many Twitter users chose to lash out at this distinguished woman, whose words will forever ring out in the human psyche, more than their retweets or comment threads that in 2 months will be all but forgotten.

In Maya's response to Kim, I see my aunts. I see the mothers at the church, the ones with the church candy and lap scarves and Bibles older than I am. I see my own grandmothers, time-worn but sharp. I see Black Women, who have survived much and carried the weight of their children, their men, their people, this whole nation on their black and brown and tan backs, with stories and slave songs and wisdom and witt and hymns and hallelujahs running through their blood.

The least we can do is call them Miss.
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