Ways to Self Care after a Break Up

Break ups happen. 

People grow and change and relationships should have room to do so too, even if it means a break up.

With that being said, break ups suck. They hurt like hell. They leave you bewildered and confused. If it’s a significantly long relationship, you look back at all the time and wonder if you wasted it all. All the heart break, sadness, even depression are all part of the grieving period.

If know a thing (or 10) about break ups, it’s that when one happens to you, there are ways you should care for yourself after one.

Here are 10 ways to self care post break up.

Do not communicate 

Once you two have called it quits, it is okay, even necessary for there to be some distance and radio silence between you and your former significant other. There are so many emotions swirling right now, the last thing you want is to say something you may regret or make a decision you will regret. Take time apart.

Do feel what you feel

Relationships come with a hurricane of emotions, and the end of hoe is usually where the hurricane is at its worst. Feel it all. And don't let anyone tell you when or how long to feel what you feel. If you need to cry for 3 weeks, do it. If you only feel sad for a day and snap back like a new set of Spanx, then don't feel guilty about that.

Do not go on their social media

It may be tempting to scroll through his/her social media to see if he or she deleted your pics or posted anything new. Don't do that. Seriously. It's not good for your mental health either way. Remember care tip number 1 above.

Do clean up your house

A proper cleansing of your spaces is in order. There is something cathartic about clearing out your space. And I am not just talking about minimalism here. There is a spiritual clearing out that also happens when you clean up. And, after all of that grieving you did in care tip 2, you probably need to tidy up anyway.

Do not get lost in romantic confusion

That romance Spotify list or that album you both love to listen to, those rom-coms and romantic movies and shows y'all indulged in together? Yeah, nix all of that. At least until you are done grieving. One of the last things you need is to get all triggered because your two favorite characters finally got together or your "song" played. Give it a break.

Do take a luxurious bath

Does this one really need an explanation? Baths are heaven. You should take one with your most luxurious products. Light the fancy candle. Pour a cup or tea or glass of wine. Put on the fancy pjs. Just for you.

Do not start a new relationship right away

Relationships are not like pets or plants; if you lose one, you cannot just replace one with another. Especially if you haven't had a chance to sort out all of your emotions yet. Chill out and work on all of the platonic and familial relationships instead.

Do have a good meal

Again, self explanatory. Have a dessert too, while you're at it.

Do not feel hopeless

I know what it feels like when you have invested so much time into a person that has really yielded no dividends. You start looking at the remainder of your life as one long lonely abyss of solo pics while your friends and family seem like they all have relationships straight from the romance novels. Stop that. Snap out of it. It's just one break up. That's it. Give it and your heart time.

Do exercise

Exercise is a wonder way to process what you are feeling. Maybe you need to move around some, or a lot to release all of what you're feeling.

Have you been through a rough break up? How did you self care your way out of it?