Woke while dating White: Why is Donald Glover facing backlash over White Partner?

BET.com

Donald Glover has ignited a conversation. No, I am not speaking on the This Is America video.

Only mere days after a blowout Saturday Night Live performance and the visual drop for his new single, a photo of Glover emerged. He is seen with two small children and his long time girlfriend and mother of his children, Michelle, out and about living life.

For me, it’s nothing. Just Donald, out and about with his family.

But for other women in the Black community, it feels like some sort of offense or deep betrayal. In fact, Glover’s choice in a non black partner has ignited a discussion in the Black Community: can you be Woke while dating White?

For me the answer is quite obvious. Admittedly, where I can see the argument becoming a problem is if Glover was using this White Woman as some sort of trophy along with some sort of language implying his choosing a white partner was because of some deficiency in Black Woman (here’s looking at you Tiger Woods). But if Glover is with Michelle because, I don’t know, he loves her, then what is the problem?

Just because Glover has chosen a white romantic partner doesn’t negate his ability to create Black art. In fact, I would dare to say one has nothing to do with the other. Glover is a Black man living in America, which alone gives him enough justification and experience to create authentic Black art.

It should be noted that Donald created his show, Atlanta, his album Awaken My Love (both steeped in Black culturalisms and commentaries) featuring his song Redbone, with its cultural rallying cry of “stay woke”, performed on SNL, and created The Is America, all while he was with Michelle, his white partner.

Glover, along with Jordan Peele, Don Lemon, and many others whose voices have amplified the concerns of our community shouldn’t be stifled or discounted because of their choices in non black romantic partners. These men aren’t with their non black partners as some sort of status symbol, but it is because that is who they fell in love with. I should also note that even President Obama once dated (and proposed to twice) a White woman before meeting Michelle (his Michelle, not Donald's Michelle.).

And miss me with the drama of Black Women don’t date quirky/ nerdy Black men. This is just like saying all Black Women are loud, have bad attitudes, or any one of the myriad of stereotypes. The implication here is that Black Women all have the same preferences, likes and desires, which, as with any group of people, is simply not true.

I think it’s more insulting to me that we are STILL having this antiquated, outdated, tired discussion of measuring one another’s Blackness about Glover when the real discussion previously surrounding his art is the more worthy dialogue. Blackness can be qualified but cannot be quantified by surface level life choices. It cannot be counted or measured as if there is only one or even a few ways to be Black.

This asinine argument over who Glover chooses to partner with as some sort of negative feels like a hijacking of a more critical conversation previously surrounding Glover’s current art speaking to the discussion of gun violence and reform, racism, and marginalized communities of color.

Let’s focus our energy on that and let people love who they wish.